Stereotypes Americans have about Koreans:
(1) All Koreans are good at math.
Not all stereotypes are bad. Like the one about Black dudes having big cocks, sometimes a stereotype can work in your favor, and I think this is one of them. Asians ARE better at math than their American counterparts. My 5th grade students can do amazing things with numbers... They can take derivatives of equations and multiply any 2 digit number by another 2 digit number in their head and other crazy shit like that.
American Math Test Question and Answer:
Korean Math Test and Question and Answer:
I think there are several reasons why Asians are good at math.
1 - Their parents...
All of my students both fear and respect their parents a great deal. Korean parents believe in the old bible adage, "Spare the rod, spoil the child"... These people aren't afraid to beat the crap out of their kids if the situation calls for it. I saw this one parent screaming at her kid in Korean at the store the other day, and even I was fucking scared! Then she picked him up and slapped him like a 3 year old at K-Mart... THEN, she screamed at him for crying about it... She was pretty hot too...
And they pay top dollar and make their kids study fucking HELLA hard to make sure that they'll have a good job so they can support their parents later in life...
2 - Their number system...
Asian languages are fucking WAY less complicated than English. And their numbers are the same way. They have the standard 1 through ten, but after 10 comes... Ten One... Then Ten Two... and so on... In English we have eleven... What the fuck is eleven?... And then twelve... I know it's easy for us English speakers to know what it means but honestly what is easier... Eleven, or Ten-One... Korean numbers follow a certain pattern that is very predictable and very easy to learn and follow. In the English language, you must know 24 different words in order to count to 100, in Korea... 11. It makes visualizing and comparing numbers so much easier.
Also, the way they pronounce the number's is super more logical. Take the ratio 4/7... Four Sevenths... What the fuck is a Seventh? Like the date? In Korean, 4/7 is translated: Out of 7 take 4... Way easier. I think it is this basic ease at the very beginning that allows Asians to feel more comfortable with numbers and allow them to excel at math.
3 - Their schools...
Korean schools are way more rigorous than American schools. These kids go to school all day and then probably 75% of kids go to private study academies, or Hagwons, after school... And, like an underfed elephant at a 3rd rate circus, these kids are expected to perform. How a kid performs on his elementary exam dictates which middle school he will go to... And doing well on a middle school exam get them into a good high school... and so on and so on... So getting on the right track early is EVERYTHING to these people. Schools and parents put so much pressure on young children that it makes them sick, literally. 2 kids in my class had to go to the hospital last month before a big test... One was breaking out in hives from the stress and the others hair was falling out from all of the pressure...
Math Verdict: TRUE
(2) All Asians have small cocks.
Now I don't have any first hand evidence for this, I've never seen an Asian's cock before. But I do have 1 piece of circumstantial evidence and one sworn testimony that could shed some light on the subject.
First and foremost, have you EVER seen an Asian guy in a porn film? Me either.
Now to the testimony... So I was talking to a friend the other night who just happened to be a girl. We were shooting the shit and the subject of hooking up with Asians finally came up. I asked her if Asians were her type and if she had ever hooked up with a "real Asian". She told me the best story.
So she was down in Busan, a large San Francisco style city at the far south of the Korean peninsula. She was out clubbing it up and started dancing with a Korean guy... One thing led to another and they ended up at this little love motel. (In Korea, love motels are EVERYWHERE, they are super cheap and always super tacky... We're talking neon cherry's everywhere and heart or lips shaped jacuzzis...) So they were doing their thing, and the guy pulled out a little case with something in it... It turned out to be a penis extension! This guy popped it on and... Boom goes the dynamite...
These things are for sale in hotels and bars in dirty little vending machines. I have seen them!
Cock Verdict: INCONCLUSIVE
(3) All Asians are terrible drivers.
I don't know if it's really bad driving, or just controlled anarchy. I have yet to see a car crash here in Korea and have seen some fucking TERRIBLE driving. Motorcyclists drive on the sidewalk all the time, they drive in bike lanes, they drive around cars stopped are red lights... On the wrong side of the road. Motorcyclists drive with no helmets, they have 2 of their friends on the bike behind them and I have seen a few times 3 people on a bike with EACH one smoking a cigarette and laughing... But I have never seen an accident...
And the bus drivers and taxi drivers... Holy shit! These guys run red lights, pass people on the wrong side of the road and make turn from like 3 lanes in the opposite direction... It's like a video game sometimes... When I first came to Korea I wanted to get a little scooter and smash around with a long scarf and goggles like some kind of baller or the Red Barron or something... But I have since decided against it... I'm not sure if I can become a part of the controlled anarchy, and don't want to be an addition to some Korean's car hood... And Boom goes the dynamite...
Bad Driving Verdict: TRUE
(4) All Koreans hate Japanese people.
I never really knew about this intercontinental rivalry before I came to Korea... But it is alive and well. I was talking to this South Korean guy about a week ago about North Korea... Remember the Pollyanna guy from the last post? He was going on and on about how he doesn't hate the North Koreans and how bla bla bla... But then he goes... "But I DO hate the Japanese"... and I was like WHOA!
I guess there is a super competative/hateful relationship between the 3 different Asian races around this place... Look at this sign from Japan...
I asked my co-teacher to translate and she got super offended and acted like I had this sign over the door at my house... Then I explained to her that I too hate Japanese people with all their Judo and sushi and ninjas and stuff...and we connected on a racist/hate-based level... Probably the deepest level 2 humans can connect on...
She told me it says "NO KOREANS INSIDE"... Which is pretty fucked up...
I mean, Korean's have souls too... At least I think they do...
Japanese-Hating Verdict: INCONCLUSIVE
(5) All Koreans eat rice with every meal.
This one is HELLA true... Every store you go into has huge 50 pound bags of rice piled up to the ceiling, and there are like 50 different brands...
On the first day of school there was a huge pile of rice vomited up right outside the entrance to the school and I remember thinking to myself, "It's a little early for rice, no?" But, like a withering alcoholic, these people never stop.
I was chopping it up with my co teacher the other day... We were making pancakes... And I asked her what some traditional Korean breakfast foods were... She told me that Korean's don't have different foods for different meals! They just eat 3 meals a day of whatever the fuck they feel like or have around the apartment. She told me that rice is a very popular food in Korea... In fact... Rice is such a huge part of the culture that another way to say hello in Korea is... 당신이 아직 먹었다 밥을 있다... Or, " Have you eaten rice today?"... Crazy Huh?...
Rice Verdict: TRUE
(6) All Koreans beat their wives.
(Rice Again???)
I have heard this several times before and wondered if it was true. I'm sure not all Koreans beat their wives and truly believe that probably more American's are wife beaters than Koreans... However... I do have, again, 1 piece of circumstantial evidence and one sworn testimony to present...
Evidence... There are like 4 different 911-style numbers to call for help in Korea. 112 is for the police... 113 is to report a spy... 119 is for Fire and Emergency services and... 129 is to report a domestic emergency... I, again, am NOT saying that all Koreans beat their wives but... They do have a special number for it...
And the testimony: A few weeks back a bunch of us fucking white people went out for food. So we were talking and this guys tells us about something he saw the night before right outside of his house. He was walking home around 8pm and heard a scream coming from the little alley way behind his house. He walks over and sees this guy fucking wailing on this lady, he said they were in their 50's or something. So I guess after the sex is gone, and after the love is gone, and after the conversation is gone, you can still enjoy slapping the shit out of your beautiful blushing bride... And boom goes the dynamite...
Wife-Beating Verdict: FALSE
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